INFJ Problems – Addition

Hi, I’m an INFJ… and I suck at math.

I’m not talking about complex math or even algebra, calculus or trigonometry. No, I mean simple addition. Let me give you an example…

Demand + Supply + Return On Investment = one depleted and frustrated INFJ.


I’ll break this down.


  • “Come out to this party/event/social gathering”
  • “Please could you just do x, y, z for me?”
  • “I know you’re busy but…”

+ Supply

  • “Sure I can do that because I’m an INFJ and saying yes means more than my sanity.”
  • “Absolutely I can do x, y, z because I’m an INFJ and I don’t know how to say no.”
  • “Yes, I am insanely busy but I’ll make myself extra stressed and do this for you. Why? Because that’s what we do.”

+ Return on Investment

  • “Oh hi… I really need your help with x, y, z and seeing as I helped you that time I thought you might return the favour?” “No. I’m a different Type and I have no problem saying No.”
  • *Sitting at the social event patting the dog, looking at phone, trying not to look at watch* “Oh aren’t you glad you came now?” *grins through lying teeth* “Yeah!”

= one depleted and frustrated INFJ

So. There you have it. INFJ’s suck at addition. After soooo many times of coming across the above mathematical equation, we still. can’t. get. it. right.


*If you’d like to know more about INFJs or the Myers Briggs Personality Types follow this link.


32 thoughts on “INFJ Problems – Addition

  1. I read an article recently that suggested that my Zodiac personality type has a deep aversion to conflict, to the point where this personality type will bend over backwards to help others, out of a desire to avoid conflict, right up until the moment when the last straw falls, and that powder keg finally explodes.
    Sometimes we really need the company of other givers, who will listen to our offer and reply with “this time, how about I do something for you.”

    It’s funny. People talk about the theory of how this type is “so nice”, but the reality is this is exactly the type that you don’t want to anger, because after so much generosity, that anger can feel pretty justified.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, and when they do finally go off, they go off in a BAD way. I have brought 6 foot men to tears with my rage when it finally blows. However. You’re right, most of the time I put myself through hell to avoid conflict, and with an INFJ husband, we’re both the same. So we both go to everything we get asked to because we do to want to let people down, and moan about it right up to the moment we leave, and then for hours after we get home!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Perhaps you’re just unrealistically ambitious? Sometimes I think we’ve been infected with this idea that the more you do/achieve, the happier you will be.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Haha, have I got an example of this for you! A few months ago my apartment committee held an annual meeting and part of it was to elect new committee members. Somehow I got roped in as a committee member and I couldn’t say no. So I asked for a role that doesn’t involve finances, and guess which role I’ve got? A treasurer. 😅

    Also on the subject of math; it’s way faster to ask my husband to calculate stuff for me than to do them myself. 😆

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha, that’s so funny Nicolle, and I bet when they said, “you’re treasurer” you said “oh, great, thanks so much” (inwardly screaming, noooooo).
      And yes, when it comes to math, that’s hubby’s chore along with the garbage!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi. I’m Staci and I’m an INFJ with math issues. (Is there a 12-step program for this?)

    I was okay in elementary school math, but start adding letters to an equation or (God forbid) logs, trig functions, or whatever the heck an imaginary number is, and I crumble. My husband, on the other hand, can calculate car payments in his head faster than the salesman can with a calculator. How does that even happen? Funny thing is, I got a higher SAT math score than he did. That doesn’t make sense to me… more math that doesn’t add up.

    As to your equation above, I try to do that math constantly and I always come up short. But I keep trying. (You know what they say about doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results…)

    Liked by 2 people

  4. You nailed it with that one. I think the word “no” doesn’t’ fit into the INFJ personality because God forbid we would upset/disappoint someone or turn away from a challenge. INFJs strive for perfection in all things, including being everything for everyone. Of course when we fail, it’s a long tumble down. Will we never learn?

    BTW, I thoroughly suck at math. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I’m INTJ, but can relate. I frequently fall into a work situation where something big is going on, requiring multiple people to deliver their part by a deadline. I’m usually two weeks ahead of time, and once delivered my part two months early. I work for someone who always delivers at deadline plus ten. Then my supervisor has the audacity to ask me for edits after the deadline passed. I delivered early to get time for edits.

    Liked by 2 people

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